Recently I had to come to the conclusion that I am officially addicted to taking yoga teacher training programs from multiple schools and teachers from around the world. I think it would come to no surprise with anyone on this site or in general that yoga can become quite addicting but not in a bad way. I used to be a marathon runner which got me turned on to it in the first place (ouch my knees). The adrenaline from running was another addiction but of course this is much different then the feeling I get from yoga.
When I first started practicing yoga I noticed how my body loved it. But more importantly, my soul and "inner self" was experiencing a completely different high then I had ever felt. As I started to noticed my inner changes, I could see how my "outer world" was changing along with it. My meditation teacher Rod Stryker of ParaYoga would always talk about how only state of being matters and that what is happening in the outer world does not. At first I did not understand this completely until I took my first yoga instructor training course.
In being a yoga student and just practicing it in class is a much different experience then teaching it. While I am in no way a formal teacher per se, as I start to look at this practice through the eyes of a teacher it is starting to look and feel much different now. I have had the great fortune to take a few yoga certification courses with some great schools from around the world and its as if I am completing a new level of a video game each time I finish. As I leave the program I feel so much more grounded in this world but not of it. My state of being is completely changing and although the world is technically the same, its not.
More and more I am starting to see how state of being is all that matters. When I first started out in my yoga practice it was because I wanted to heal the physical. But now I see the physical is just a reflection of the inner emotional body. During my yoga training programs as I live it more through the eyes of a teacher, I can now see so much more that was always there but was not available to me. As the saying goes "When the student is ready the teacher will appear" which is very true as I have had some great teachers "appear" once I reached a certain state within myself.
So I am officially confessing that I am now addicted to yoga teacher training programs. Maybe addicted is not the right word. Maybe its more that I am in love with myself as every time I take a training I just become so much more settled within and feel much more at home in my body. This is such an interesting and unique feeling I have never experienced before and I must say that I am so excited to see what else I will discover along this path.
While I have no expectations as I do practice living in the moment, at the same time I find myself quite curious as to what I can discover through my yoga teacher training endeavors. I was never interested in traveling to India but am now starting to feel the call in me that I may want to go and check it out. I used to have an idea of what it was all about and to be quite honest it was negative. Now I feel it tugging and pulling in my heart and soul and am curious as to see what will I find? I suppose just more of me.